Friday, April 24, 2015

Hall of Lulz 4 - The Awakening

The Comedians: Ammolds von Lichenstein, Zuz, Krakza and Happy Lemon/Secret Squirrel | (various players from LotRO) Corak, Kheluin, Ovoceedee, Fumori, Deorwod, Prono and Motivator.



1.
'zuz: How to twerk: Step 1) Reconsider

2.
Ammolds von Lichenstein: Alright I'm going to go and proceed with the act of looking like a fool now because Valentines Day.
'zuz: you mean alentines ay.
'zuz: because neither of us are getting the v or giving the d today.

3.
'zuz: You're only a smartass if you can sit on an icecream cone and tell me what flavor it is.


4.
Corak: Was thinking of a new squishy tank class...the Gourdian.
Kheluin: Let me guess, they get squishier as they level and after 50 they start to attract fruit flies...
Corak: Could grow on ya.

5.
Ovoceedee: WTB popcorn
Fumori: [popcorn] 2 gold.
Deorwod: Sheesh when did it get so expensive?
Fumori: Takes me awhile to farm the butter.
Fumori: Gotta milk it for all it's worth.
Fumori: Ho-ho-ho.

6.
Ammolds von Lichenstein: Do we have a plan D?
Krakza: Threaten Happy's IT staff
Happy Lemon: Give them the D.
Krakza: Or... that I guess

7.
Krakza: tl;dr where the white bitches @?
Happy Lemon: In me pans.
Happy Lemon: ts
Krakza: pansts
Happy Lemon: God damnit.
Ammolds von Lichenstein: Pans
Ammolds von Lichenstein: Peter Pans
Happy Lemon: PANS
Krakza: You don't cook those
Krakza: Happy for God's-
Happy Lemon: What?
Happy Lemon: They told me it'd taste great.
Krakza: Happy just hasn't been the same since he was forced into intercourse by 3 Gorillas
Krakza: That was a bad day at the zoo...
Happy Lemon: What are you talking about, I've never even seen gorillas in a zoo.
Krakza: The denial is strong these days

8.
Krakza: Hence my er
Krakza: Chantry robes
Krakza: Despite being a non-religious Dwarf
Ammolds von Lichenstein: Well
Ammolds von Lichenstein: You -are- a rogue.
Ammolds von Lichenstein: And the robe's a disguise.
Krakza: Much sneakies
Ammolds von Lichenstein: I mean, dwarven priests are highly respected afterall.
Ammolds von Lichenstein: Mostly because they'll strangle any heretics with their beard.
Krakza: The Beard knows all, the Beard sees all, flee unbelievers, your impurities are clear to the senses of the HOLY BEARD

9.
Ammolds von Lichenstein: "The Bearding"
Krakza: xD
Ammolds von Lichenstein: xD
Krakza: XD
Krakza: XDDDDDDD
Krakza: xD
Ammolds von Lichenstein: NO
Krakza: Dx
Ammolds von Lichenstein: OMG
Krakza: xD
Ammolds von Lichenstein: *dies*
Krakza: The Beard has spoken

10.
'zuz: So basically I burnt like 100 calories for nothing
'zuz: AND I LIKED THOSE CALORIES >.(
Ammolds von Lichenstein: WELL YOU AIN'T GETTIN' 'EM BACK
Ammolds von Lichenstein: YE HEAR!?!?
'zuz: LIEZ! *Starts eating muffins*
'zuz: *Smears it over face"
'zuz: OBESITY IS WORTH IT
'zuz: Reminds me of the time my mom got me 2kgs of double chocolate buiscuits
'zuz: "Mom, Im going to get Diabetes, but Im sure as hell going to love you every step of the way"

11.
Krakza: GW2 tomorrow?
Ammolds von Lichenstein: Sure
Krakza: and I'll EL toosday
Ammolds von Lichenstein: 'kay
Ammolds von Lichenstein: I'm not married, so if you book time. I can tell other people to fug off.
Krakza: >not married
Krakza: Coulda fooled me
Ammolds von Lichenstein: What's between me and your mother doesn't concern you.
Krakza: IT DOES WHEN IT KEEPS ME UP AT NIGHT
Krakza: SOME OF US *WORK* YOU KNOW
Ammolds von Lichenstein: ALL YOU DO IS FUCKING COMPLAIN
Ammolds von Lichenstein: I DON'T GET WHY SHE HASN'T KICKED YOU OUT YET
Ammolds von Lichenstein: This sounds disturbingly real
Ammolds von Lichenstein: I must
Ammolds von Lichenstein: stop now
Krakza: But it is real, Ammolds
Krakza: You monster
Krakza: I hope you're proud
Ammolds von Lichenstein: DAMN STRAIGHT I'M PROUD
Ammolds von Lichenstein: THAT MY SON HAS A JOB AND A GF
Ammolds von Lichenstein: *sheds a tear of manly proudness*
Krakza: :3
Krakza: I DID IT ALL FOR YOU
Krakza: Wait
Krakza: what
Ammolds von Lichenstein: I don't know anymore.
Ammolds von Lichenstein: I really
Ammolds von Lichenstein: don't

12.
Krakza: Origin's April Fool's joke seems to be its inability to connect
Krakza: ONLINE LOGIN IS CURRENTLY UNAVAILABLE
Krakza: "Yeah... April... uh... fools... right..."

13.
'zuz: You know
'zuz: i will cherish the day when you hug me before I have a chance to take my pants off
'zuz: You're pretty when Im drunk
Ammolds von Lichenstein: Such a charmer.

14.
'zuz: My Americans are completely unleveled
'zuz: And my Japs
'zuz: and my germans
Ammolds von Lichenstein: so you've been just Vodkaing up?
'zuz: In tank yes
'zuz: Very big gun makes very big boom
'zuz: German pigs will eat shit!

15.
Ammolds von Lichenstein: sent inv
Ammolds von Lichenstein: so wat are we doan?
'zuz: Well, We can either Russian, German or Jap plane or Tank.
Ammolds von Lichenstein: Planes or tanks
Ammolds von Lichenstein: pick sumtin
'zuz: Im telling you to choose.
Ammolds von Lichenstein: I have all dailies
Ammolds von Lichenstein: you wanted to do dailies
'zuz: Youre giving me problems. I want solutions.
Ammolds von Lichenstein: That's how relationships work.

16.
'zuz: Vodka Diet: Loose 3 days in one week

17.
'zuz: Darling
Ammolds von Lichenstein: Love muffin.
'zuz: Sugar toes/
Ammolds von Lichenstein: Honey-lips
'zuz: Sweet cheeks
'zuz: (The face ones)
Ammolds von Lichenstein: Yeah I've got nothing
'zuz: My next one wouldve been fat ass, so Its a good thing we stopped

18.
Ammolds von Lichenstein: Remember how much we love DotA 2?
'zuz: Yes?
Ammolds von Lichenstein: I was just asking since I sure don't.
'zuz: Why would you do that
'zuz: Like
'zuz: Why
'zuz: Would you do that
Ammolds von Lichenstein: Maybe it's the fact that I've played it for over 800 hours
Ammolds von Lichenstein: but I can't muster the strength to play it again
'zuz: Really? I didnt get that impression since you uninstalled it in the ass so often

19.
Ammolds von Lichenstein: zuz
Ammolds von Lichenstein: do you remember how we met?
'zuz: Something about me being crap at dota
'zuz: And saying "HELP!"
'zuz: And you said "FUCK OFF NOOB!"
'zuz: So I added you
Ammolds von Lichenstein: Good times.

20.
Prono: 'oh NOW i see it ... the drop down calls it Ered-Luin: Thorin's Gate >.<'
Prono: 'i kept double cheecking the t's lol doh!'
Prono: 'double cheeking? lol'
Motivator: 'Well no point going at it half-assed!'

21.
'zuz: See
'zuz: Integration
'zuz: The opposite of differentiation
'zuz: Is rape
'zuz: So does that mean differentiation is when you rape them?
Ammolds von Lichenstein: Well
Ammolds von Lichenstein: That's debatable.
Ammolds von Lichenstein: Are we talking about sticking it in the butt or between the tities?
'zuz: Between the butt.
Ammolds von Lichenstein: Are we talking about a 90 degree angle?
'zuz: Its a 120 Im afraid.
'zuz: With a further 5 degree blowback.
'zuz: It isnt looking good...
Ammolds von Lichenstein: *shakes head*
Ammolds von Lichenstein: *sighs*
Ammolds von Lichenstein: Scrap everything
Ammolds von Lichenstein: and back to the drawing board, everyone.

22.
Secret Squirrel: tfw I got a crafting level 400 schematic from a chest.
Ammolds von Lichenstein: Wot chest?
Secret Squirrel: Exploration chest.
Secret Squirrel: Shit you find in the world without an indication.
Ammolds von Lichenstein: Well yeah, but
Ammolds von Lichenstein: wot zone?
Secret Squirrel: WHAT AM I PLAYING?
Secret Squirrel: Charr starting area.
Ammolds von Lichenstein: Fucked if I know what you are playing
Ammolds von Lichenstein: MAYBE YOU DECIDED TO PLAY A DIFFERENT STARTING AREA!?!?
Secret Squirrel: WELL I DID NOT
Secret Squirrel: HOW DARE YOU NOT BE PSYCHIC?
Secret Squirrel: HOW
Secret Squirrel: DARE
Secret Squirrel: YOU

23.
Krakza: Happy, put the Guild Wars down
Krakza: Your family haven't seen you in weeks
Krakza: Can't you see this has gone far enough!?
Krakza: *misc sobs in background*
Krakza: He's not responding
Krakza: It's too late for him, Bobby
Krakza: You gotta do it
Krakza: Put him down
Krakza: But Micha-
Krakza: DO IT
Krakza: ...
Krakza: *shots fired*
Krakza: *credits roll with sad song playing*
Krakza: RIP in peace, Goat #55428

24.
Ammolds von Lichenstein: I'll finish Fornost
Ammolds von Lichenstein: and then we can lek 2
Secret Squirrel: Shur.
Ammolds von Lichenstein: provided I don't have to go outside for shit
Secret Squirrel: Why would-.. I just-..
Secret Squirrel: WE'RE LIVING
Secret Squirrel: IN 21ST CENTURY
Ammolds von Lichenstein: xD
Secret Squirrel: YOU HAVE TOILETS FOR THAT
Ammolds von Lichenstein: NOT THAT
Secret Squirrel: -IN-
Ammolds von Lichenstein: FUCKING HELL
Secret Squirrel: THE HOUSE.
Ammolds von Lichenstein: besidse
Ammolds von Lichenstein: the breeze
Secret Squirrel: >:|
Ammolds von Lichenstein: Have you ever
Ammolds von Lichenstein: felt the gentle spring breeze on your cheeks?
Ammolds von Lichenstein: HAVE YOU!??!
Ammolds von Lichenstein: WELL I HAVE
Ammolds von Lichenstein: IT'S GLORIOUS
Secret Squirrel: Hmph.

25.
'zuz: Did you not read about the man who found the love of his life the day after he won the lotto?
Ammolds von Lichenstein: Did he marry his right leg?
'zuz: I believe it was his middle leg.
Ammolds von Lichenstein: Ah
Ammolds von Lichenstein: That explains it
'zuz: I have five legs.
'zuz: and 7 nipples
Ammolds von Lichenstein: Good
'zuz: Easy access?
Ammolds von Lichenstein: No
'zuz: Waffles?
Ammolds von Lichenstein: Bacon
'zuz: Damnit.
'zuz: I thought I had that one.

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